Sucks to be me... a bit exaggerated, but mostly true
Sure I don't have it quite as bad as some people. But this was just annoying.
I had a stalker.
A year 8 stalker. Gross - i know.
Do I look thirteen or something????? Probably. That's why I always had to play pre-pubescent boys in school plays. aaaaa. Totally distraught. And then in year 11 -
Ms B: here Tess, put this baggy jumper on so you can be a young Malcolm in Macbeth.
Me: But I don't want to be a boy - I'm always the boy... why can't someone else do it??
Ms B: Sorry, you are the only one with the physique here to pull it
off, plus, all of the males here have low voices. Think of it as having
boyish charm.
Me: Can't I be Lady Macbeth?? Check this out - (I'm spraying my drink
bottle on my hands) OUT, OUT, DAMN SPOT! (Some idiot was in the
background yelling "aaaaayyyyyyyyyy charmer")
Ms B: Thank you, but I'm not "checking" anything "out". And you (the
idiot) can stop making suggestive noises and put your beard back on!
Tess, hun, put the boy costume on, and don't forget to tuck your hair
under the cap. It's quite cute.
Great. Thanks Ms Boucher. My dreams of being a reasonably nice looking young woman have been smashed against the rocks. Forever to be known as the girl with boyish charm.
At my own wedding, someone will probably ask if I am the ring bearer. RAAAAAAAAAA.
Probably stems from starting my sporting "career" off in an all boys baseball team, because they had no girls ones for that age group.
Anyway, the stalker kid is this boy called Shannan - same spelling as the buff trainer off biggest loser - he stalked me last year too. We just got this swish new library at school and we (Marie, Gity, Steph, Jess, Aparna, AJ and I) went to check it out. It was pretty good. Good for rampaging, that is!
Rampages in the library mainly consisted of moving all the books around to the different sections i.e: fiction in non-fiction, atlases in the magazine holder, anime on the top of the highest book case (the year sevens are the only ones who read it... and can't reach). One time we took all the books from the return trolley and put them just inside the alarm sensors near the doors. That way, when people went to pick them up, they set off the alarms and were surrounded by the year 9 duty (suck-up) monitors and had to explain that they weren't actually stealing a book from the library.
One particular rampage (which I wasn't a part of) - during a free (sorry - study period), Paige set off the fire extinguisher in the study room (never ever ever do that. It's dumb and costs lots of money. NEVER DO PRANKS THAT CAN HARM PEOPLE PHYSICALLY OR FINANCIALLY!!!), therefore - I had to go and study out in the general library area. I was trying to study - really, I had a Chinese oral SAC the next period - but this boy kept staring at me. Creeeepy. He didn't even move away when I looked back at him.
The next week - same thing. Just so you know, I was actually banned from the study room for three weeks - I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!!!. So I asked him what his favourite subject was etc etc. Anyway - he looked up my timetable and started waiting for me outside my classes.
By this time, I was getting worried - mainly for him (the week before, one of my friends said that if any creepy guys bothered me, he would "bash them to a pulp" ...nice language followed that- from him, not me - f, f, f, f etc)- I had a talk with Shannan about personal space. I didn't see him for six months. Yeeeeeeesss!
THEN... yesterday, I was getting the mail and he was coming home from school. Dun dun DUUUUUUUUUN! I just walked back inside. But today - being valentine's day and all (stupid day if you ask me), he came and stood on the front porch and sang 'Hey There Delilah' reeeeally badly. So I made him a milo and with the help of 'A from across the road', explained that he needed to find a more worthy pass time.
So he said, yes, I understand. I won't come around here anymore.
It was pretty sad, until he implied that 'A from across the road' was my boyfriend. Then it was just funny. I must have laughed for ages because I was crying. And A was laughing too.
Shannan left.
So we decided to play court cricket with the kids next door. I was really bad.
I just ended up sitting on the curb with A's sister, sharing her Bazillion chocolates that she got at work. Then she proceeded to tell me that I was cute and I had boyish charm. So I politely left and went home. I went on facebook - to be antisocial and alone. I didn't work. Dad was watching Top Gear from Monday.
Comments
xD!!!!
Hahaha, poor Tess! This is hilarious. And really disturbing. But hilarious too! Hahahaha, did he sing ALL of 'Hey there Delilah'??
LMAO! Well, don't worry Tess, before reading this I had no idea that people thought you were 'boyish' - it never occured to mee!
AWWW
*hugs* you poor thing
:) *giggles*